Friday, February 05, 2010

Happy to help?

Trring Trrring.

Me : "Hello?"
Caller : "Am I speaking to Ms Priya Mahadevan*?"
Me : "Yes, speaking."
C : "Ma'am am Shilpa* calling from Vodafone. This is a confirmation call. Ma'am, can I confirm a few things with you please?"
Me : "Yes.. please."

C : "Ma'am, is your name Priya Mahadevan*?"
Me : "Yes." (Huh? I thought you checked that after I said hello!)
C : "And your e-mail id is*?
Me : "Yes."
C : "And your DOB is 1st Jan 1981*"
Me : "Yes." (Any gift-plans?)
C : "And your favourite ice cream flavour is chocolate?"
Me : "Right!"
OK, she didn't ask me that last question. But she asked me many other almost-related questions.


C : "Are you aware of your call plans ma'am?"
Me : "Yes, I am."
C : "Even if you are aware, let me explain ma'am."
Me : "hmm.." (What the..!)
C : "Ma'am your talk plan is blah blah blah blah blah blah ma'am. Ma'am you have blah blah blah top up blah blah blah. Ma'am you also have blah blah blah blah ma'am. Blah Blah blah blah".

After about 3 minutes.

Me : (3,2,1 breathe. 3,2,1 breathe)
Me : "Thanks!"
C : "Are you aware of your call and sms charges ma'am?"
Me : "Yes yes am very much aware! You don't need to explain." (Please!)
C : "Even if you are aware, let me explain ma'am."
Me : Grrrrrrrrrrr
C : "Ma'am your local blah blah blah blah. Blah blah ma'am. Ma'am blah blah blah blah blah. Ma'am blah blah blah blah. Ma'am blah blah blah. Blah blah blah ma'am."
Me : "Sigh!"

C : "Do you want to know anything else ma'am?"
Me : "No. Please. Thanks. Please. Please. Please!"
C : "Thank you for calling Vodafone ma'am. This is Shilpa* talking to you from Vodafone. Happy to help. Have a nice day ma'am!"
Me : Huh! I thought you called me!!! :-S

*- all names, numbers changed to protect, you know, privacy :)


Pyari K said...

I am sure that before she started, she told you that the call would not take more than 30 seconds!

Cool4u said...

Nice Blog, interesting content. BTW, i registered Do not disturb. I still get trash calls.

സന്ദീപ്‌ ഉണ്ണിമാധവന്‍ said...

he he :) i am sure this has happened to almost everybody - vodafone or airtel :)

Rat said...

aa email id ittathu sheriyaayilla.. ini enganum biriyani undenkilo :-S

Usha said...


reminds me of this call I got from a lady who was contacting me on behalf of some charitable institution. Note: she doesn't know my name either.

She: Ma'm, we have 2 / 3 different options you might want to choose from to contribute..etc etc.

Me: Yeah sounds nice. I'll get back to you at a later time. I lost my job, so I dont think I can afford to help now.

She: but we have another option where you just have to pay 500rs.

Me: Lady, listen, no job.. no money, you see?

She: but we have an option where you can pay for 1 days food for...

Me: I will get back to you later. Thankyou.


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sajitha said...

really funny.. really well written.. :)